Who should we uphold as exemplary?

God is surprisingly picky about not putting youngins' and the wounded on the front lines of battle.  Still, current leaders always end up giving way to the next generations as they age, but who should we look to as examples of up-coming leadership? Philippians 3:16-17 says,  "Let us keep living by that same standard to which we have attained [...] join in following my example, and observe those who walk according to the pattern you have in us." 

So we should look up to those who have it together spiritually. But is it ok to pick young leaders? Absolutely, but when Paul selected Timothy, look at what parts of life Timothy had to be upstanding in: "Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe." (1 Tim 4:12)  

So yes, we should be urging our young people to become leaders, and even looking to them for the example of how to walk—but only if they truly walk the walk in basically EVERY FACET OF LIFE, private and public!  It's a tough challenge, so let's help people live up to it! 

What do we do if a brother or sister in Christ is living a life in open rebellion to God's Word?

What do we do if a brother or sister in Christ is living a life in open rebellion to God's Word? I heard one preacher say, "Just be nice. You can't disconnect a trailer that's not connected in the first place." Another said that we need to "get rid" of such people to "purify the church." Another favored putting them in minor leadership positions to encourage them. So what is God's advice? Check out 1 Thess 3:14-15:

"If anyone does not obey[...] take special note of that person and do not associate with him, so that he will be put to shame. Yet do not regard him as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother."

God recommends a form of ostracism so that it might produce shame and repentance on the part of the one in open rebellion, and thus result in his restoration. Sounds harsh, huh? No leading an assembly for sure, and definitely some disconnecting of the trailer from the truck! But the goal is RESTORATION. The goal is to admonish, which means to "instruct through warning."

And above all, we have to love them, and cherish them as our family. We have to wish for their success. If should grieve us to see them struggling with sin; it should hurt to limit association. Our hearts should be pained, not poisoned.

What should I do it a trusted leader turns out to be a fraud?

Growing as a Christian, it can be damaging to your faith to realize that some trusted Christian (even leader) you know turns out to be a fraud. It might make you feel stupid, like you were tricked, and it might also make you think that the leadership was also foolish. 

Satan is all about damaging your faith. Be vigilant, but realize in Matthew 13:24-30, God told you to EXPECT this trick by Satan. In fact, He flat-out warned us that there is a harvest, and the good wheat will have a lookalike weed (called a tare) among it. That weed is sown by Satan himself! So how can you be on the lookout so that you're not so hurt? Simple! "But when the wheat sprouted and bore grain, then the tares became evident also." (v26)

Look at the fruit that people produce. It can be good, bad, or non-existent. But don't be discouraged. That's what Satan wants. 

How should we choose leaders?

A young Christian I know was very upset when a person who was known to party it up was put in a leadership role for children by church leadership. This distraught person said it was highly discouraging and also stated, "It is hypocritical to put someone in leadership when they are not acting like leaders."

Perhaps that is so. While we should not shoot our wounded, we probably should not put them on the front lines, either. But primarily, if we put people who don't have their own lives even vaguely in order into leadership roles for young people, we give our own youth horrible examples to shoot for. Note this passage,  "Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us." (Phil 3:17)

The personal lives of those in leadership should be something for our youth to shoot for.  We damage the already hurt person more and put others at risk if we are not wise in such matters.